Resilience and Hope: Tibenda’s Story
Tibenda has hope for a brighter future
I'm bringing you a story of resilience and hope. The hope is because of all of you!
This is Tibenda Phiona's story as told to our team member Hilda:
Tibenda Phiona is 19 years old and from Namisambiya village in rural Uganda. Since childhood, Phiona has had a very difficult life. She was being raised by both parents, but her father was addicted to alcohol and was very violent. Phiona's mother would work in other people's gardens to try and make money to feed her six children. When her father would come back to the house at night, he was physically abusive to Phiona's mother. Phiona and her siblings would hide and sleep outside to avoid being abused. Her father would sometimes take the food her mother had prepared for dinner and pour it out, leaving them hungry.
Phiona's mother had nowhere to go with her six children, so she opted to stay and endure the abuse. Later on, Phiona's father had an accident and died, and instead of the family grieving, they felt relief. Phiona thought things were going to be smooth for her family after his death, but it was the beginning of a serious battle in the family. Phiona's uncle, her father's brother, wanted to marry her mother. (This often happens when a husband dies.) When Phiona's mother refused the uncle, his family accused her of witchcraft. Phiona's mother had to flee and go into hiding to avoid violence. This left Phiona and her sisters and brothers alone to fend for themselves and try to get food to eat.
Phiona and her siblings were desperate for food, so when a neighboring man offered her food and supplies, she was relieved. However, the man demanded sex from Phiona in exchange for the food. At this point, Phiona had no choice. She and her siblings needed to survive. At just 14 years of age, Phiona became pregnant by this man, and her paternal uncles forced him to marry her. The uncles would benefit from the “bride price,” where the husband must give gifts of livestock, food, and money to the family.
Phiona's husband took her away from her home and siblings to Namwendwa village, where they stayed for some time. She produced two children with this man. Unfortunately, the man was too violent; he always reminded Phiona that he never loved her, and he only married her because the uncles forced him. He blamed her for all his misfortunes.
But Phiona never wanted to be like her mum. She didn't want years of abuse for her and her young children. She ran away, and the man never looked for her since then. She came back to Namisambiya, their home, and started looking for a way to provide for her two children.
Phiona heard about Children's Legacy Partnership and our programs through our wonderful community advocate, Shamim (who you might remember passed away in January due to illness). Shamim did all she could to help the most vulnerable girls. Shamim let Phiona know that she could join one of our programs for girls, and she could learn a skill that would allow her to support her children.
Phiona is now enrolled in the hairdressing program at our Girls' Vocational Center in Buwudha village. The biggest change is that she now has hope for her future. After she finishes her training, Phiona wants to start a business in the village and she also wants to help other young girls. She wants to teach her sons to treat women with respect so they are not violent and manipulative. Phiona hopes for her children to get the formal education she never had.
Hilda with Phiona and the girls in the hairdressing course
When I hear the stories from some of our girls, it takes my breath away. So much hardship endured in a young life.
Thanks to all of you, our donors and supporters, Phiona had a place to go for help! Without the resources of our Vocational Center and our team, she would have no options. To see the change in our girls is remarkable! Thank you for investing in these girls.
You are making it possible for them and their children to live a better life without aid!
With Gratitude,
Mary & Hilda
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